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<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n- Can I Stop My Spouse From Divorcing Me?<\/div><\/div>If you don\u2019t want a divorce, it\u2019s normal to wonder if you can stop your spouse from doing it. The answer depends on whether your partner has already filed the papers.\r\n\r\nIf they\u2019ve yet to do so, you can still prevent the divorce from going forward. Now\u2019s the time to demonstrate to your spouse that you\u2019re committed to improving the marriage. It\u2019s vital to reach an understanding (or a commitment to working together) before lawyers or courts get involved. The first section of this guide has some fantastic tips for getting your relationship back on track.\r\n\r\nHowever, if your partner has gone ahead with filing, it\u2019s essentially impossible to stop the process of your own accord. No state will force someone to stay married solely because their partner doesn\u2019t want the marriage to end. If your spouse wants a divorce, they\u2019ll get one. What you can argue are the grounds for divorce, property distribution, and custody.<\/div><\/li>How Do I Survive a Divorce I Don\u2019t Want?<\/div><\/div>Unfortunately, there\u2019s no magic solution for surviving a divorce you don\u2019t want. The experience will likely be painful and unpleasant, and there\u2019s no timeline for how long these feelings will last. However, there are some things you can do to get through it.\r\n
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- Tap into your support system<\/strong>. Don\u2019t let yourself fall into the trap of going through things alone; now\u2019s the time to lean on those you\u2019re close to. Chances are you know at least a few people who\u2019ve gone through a divorce. Talking with others who\u2019ve been in the same situation can be massively supportive (though keep the next point in mind).<\/li>\r\n \t
- Surround yourself with positivity<\/strong>. It\u2019s super easy to hang around other divorcees and only talk about negative feelings. But wallowing in self-pity won\u2019t make things better; it will only prolong your suffering. Instead, surround yourself with positive people who are committed to moving forward. You may just find that that positivity is contagious.<\/li>\r\n \t
- Admit your faults<\/strong>. It\u2019s hard to admit our failings, but it\u2019s helpful to do so in the wake of a divorce. Otherwise, you may be prone to making the same mistakes in future relationships.<\/li>\r\n \t
- Don\u2019t try to punish your ex<\/strong>. Plenty of people want to make their ex suffer for wanting out, and they do so in all kinds of unpleasant ways. Behaviors like bad-mouthing the other person to your kids, whining, and gossiping are all common, but they should be avoided. Ultimately, these things help no one. It\u2019s a hard lesson to learn, but no matter the reason for your spouse\u2019s exit, you don\u2019t get to punish them.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul><\/div><\/li>
When Is It Too Late to Stop a Divorce?<\/div><\/div>If you\u2019re not the filing spouse, and the clerk has filed the papers at your local courthouse, it\u2019s too late to stop the process. But if you\u2019re the person who initiated the proceedings, you can usually stop them until about thirty days after the judge signed the divorce decree (though you may lose the filing fee).<\/div><\/li><\/ul><\/div><\/div><\/article><\/section>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Divorce has become ubiquitous in the twenty-first century, so much so that chances are you may know many divorced people. But despite being common, divorce is neither ideal nor desirable when you find yourself on the brink of it. It\u2019s painful and confusing, and if children, property, and pets are involved, divorce can become a … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":2523,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"none","_seopress_titles_title":"How To Stop a Divorce (Once The Process Has Started)","_seopress_titles_desc":"How to stop a divorce once the wheels are in motion? What steps can you take? It won\u2019t be easy, but it\u2019s possible to turn things around. ","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false},"categories":[116],"tags":[181],"featured_image_src":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/how-to-stop-a-divorce-600x400.jpg","featured_image_src_square":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/how-to-stop-a-divorce-600x500.jpg","author_info":{"display_name":"Lauren Cook-McKay","author_link":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/author\/laurendivorceanswers-com\/"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2522"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2522"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2522\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11017,"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2522\/revisions\/11017"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2523"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2522"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2522"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2522"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
- Surround yourself with positivity<\/strong>. It\u2019s super easy to hang around other divorcees and only talk about negative feelings. But wallowing in self-pity won\u2019t make things better; it will only prolong your suffering. Instead, surround yourself with positive people who are committed to moving forward. You may just find that that positivity is contagious.<\/li>\r\n \t
Sure, learning that they want to end the marriage is scary, and it\u2019s normal to panic when you hear these words. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But just because your spouse says they want a divorce, it doesn\u2019t mean that things can\u2019t be turned around. It may sound counterintuitive, but to get your marriage back on track, you have to accept that your partner is ready to call it quits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Why? <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Because accepting the other person\u2019s feelings (without trying to negotiate or change them) is critical if you want to move forward. In other words, validate your spouse. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Acknowledge that you understand why they feel this way and how you (both of you) got to this point. It\u2019s not easy to do, but recognizing that things haven\u2019t been great-and your part in it-is pretty powerful. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Take Divorce out of Your Vocabulary and Talk to Your Spouse<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Getting married is a choice two people make together, and so is getting divorced. When you recognize your agency in these life decisions, you realize that the power to stop a divorce lies within you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
So eliminate this word from your conversations altogether, and don\u2019t let it be part of your consciousness. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Not talking about divorce certainly doesn\u2019t mean that negative feelings will disappear, because they won\u2019t. You\u2019ll still feel anger, frustration, and hurt. But if you take divorce off the table as a way to solve your problems, you\u2019ll be forced to work through issues in other ways. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It may get rough, but you can stop divorce one hundred percent of the time if you\u2019re not contemplating it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Remember Why You Got Married<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
\u201cFor better or for worse.\u201d Chances are, your wedding vows included some iteration of this phrase. In other words, you promised to be there for the other person, through the good times and the bad. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
You promised to keep their best interests at the forefront and love them always. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s easy to be there for your spouse in happy times, but it becomes more challenging when things aren\u2019t good. So when you hit a rough patch, it\u2019s helpful to remember why you got married in the first place. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
You certainly weren\u2019t planning to get divorced someday. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Instead, you got married to have a partner for life. Keeping this fact in mind can help you turn toward one another when things are less than ideal. It\u2019s much easier to weather the storm when you\u2019re united. <\/p>\n\n\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/why-you-got-married.jpg\")
<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\nWork on Your Relationship and Maybe Feelings Can Change<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Maintaining a thriving partnership among the daily grind of work, kids, family, and friends is easier said than done. Many couples end up putting their marital issues on the back burner, which can lead to a feeling of ambivalence. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
After all, who wants to deal with trust issues or a stalled relationship when you\u2019ve got a million other things to take care of?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Successful marriages take work-and lots of it. You may be surprised that negative feelings can change, simply by prioritizing your marriage. Some easy things you can do to work on your relationship today include:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
- Set aside one-on-one time<\/li>
- Be a better listener<\/li>
- Go to bed at the same time<\/li>
- Do a novel activity together<\/li>
- Exercise together<\/li>
- Learn the other person\u2019s love languages<\/a><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n
Seek Counseling<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
One of the most effective tools at preventing divorce is seeking the help of a marriage counselor<\/a> or therapist (the same is true even if your marriage is thriving, as therapy can help keep it that way!). <\/p>\n\n\n\n
There are many reasons to get a therapist, and one of the most common is difficulty communicating effectively. Whether you have problems communicating because of anger, trust issues, or fear, having a neutral third party can help break down those barriers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Another reason to seek professional help is to reap the benefits of the years of training and experience a marriage counselor brings to the table. They can provide resources and tips for working through your problems, and offer you a safe space to do so. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n \n\t\n\n\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\tWhat We Recommend\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t![\"Online](\"https:\/\/divorceanswers.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/online-therapy-logo-lasso.webp\")
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