Leaving a spouse is never easy, especially if you don't have any money.
That's because, without financial independence, you may feel like you have no choice but to stay in an unhappy or even abusive relationship.
But options are available to you, even if you don't have income. This article will explore how you can leave your husband without money.
First and foremost, you must realize that you are not alone. There are many women in your situation, and there is help available.
Several organizations can offer you financial assistance and support through direct financial aid, resources, and advice.
One such organization is the National Domestic Violence Hotline. This hotline provides 24/7 support for domestic violence victims and can help connect you with local resources.
They also offer several helpful articles on their website, including one on leaving an abusive relationship.
Another vital resource is the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV). The NCADV provides many services for victims of domestic violence, including a 24-hour crisis line, legal assistance, and financial assistance.
Several state-level organizations can offer assistance. These organizations vary from state to state, but a quick internet search should help you find the ones in your area.
In addition to these organizations, several government programs can offer financial assistance to victims of domestic violence. These programs provide grants to states to fund domestic violence shelters and provide financial assistance to victims of crime.
Tips for Leaving Your Husband If You Have No Money
Now that you know you're not alone and that there is help available, there are some things you can do to increase your chances of success in leaving your husband.
By following these tips, you can make the process easier and increase your chances of financial independence.
Make a Plan
The first and most crucial step is to make a plan. Doing this may seem complicated, but it's essential to clearly understand what you need to do and how you will do it.
Your plan should include three main elements:
1. How you're going to support yourself financially
2. Where you're going to live
3. How you're going to protect yourself and your children from your husband
Let's explore each of these elements in more detail.
Financial Support
If you don't have any income, you'll need to find some way to support yourself financially. Several options are available, including government assistance programs, nonprofit organizations, and personal loans:
- Government Assistance Programs: As mentioned above, several government assistance programs are available to victims of domestic violence. These programs can provide the financial support you need to leave your husband.
- Nonprofit Organizations: In addition to government assistance programs, there are also nonprofit organizations that can help you financially. These organizations often have financial assistance programs specifically for victims of domestic violence.
- Personal Loans: If you have good credit, you may be able to take out a personal loan to help you financially. This option can be expensive, but it may be necessary if you don't have any other options.
Where to Live
The next element of your plan is finding a place to live. If you have family or friends you can stay with, that's often the best option. But options are still available if you don't have anywhere to go:
- Domestic Violence Shelters: Domestic violence shelters can be a great option if you don't have anywhere to stay. These shelters provide safe havens for victims of domestic violence and can offer a variety of services, including financial assistance, legal assistance, and counseling.
- Hotels/Motels: If you can't stay with family or friends and there are no domestic violence shelters in your area, you may have to stay in a hotel or motel. This option can be expensive, but it's often cheaper than renting an apartment.
- Renting an Apartment: If you have the financial resources, you may want to consider renting an apartment. This option gives you more independence than staying in a shelter or hotel, but it can be expensive. However, if you don't have any money, this option might not work.
- Staying with Family or Friends: If you have family or friends you can stay with, that's often the best option. This option gives you a place to stay for free and can provide emotional support. In addition, your family or friends may be able to help you financially.
Protection from Your Husband
The final element of your plan is finding a way to protect yourself and your children from your husband. Several options are available, including getting a restraining order, changing your phone number, and moving to a different location:
- Getting a Restraining Order: If you're a victim of domestic violence, you can get a restraining order against your husband. This order will prohibit him from contacting you or your children. In addition, it will give you the legal right to call the police if he violates the order.
- Changing Your Phone Number: If you're worried about your husband finding you, you may want to change your phone number. This will prevent him from being able to call or text you. In addition, it will make it more difficult for him to track your location.
- Moving to a Different Location: If you're worried about your husband finding you, you may consider moving to a different location far away from where you are currently. This option can be expensive, but it may be the only way to keep yourself and your children safe.
Read More: How Do You Mentally Prepare For A Divorce?
Talk to a Lawyer
After you've made your plan, you should talk to a lawyer. A lawyer can help you understand your legal rights and options. There are many things to consider when leaving your husband, and a lawyer can help you know all of the legal implications.
However, it's essential to know that talking to a lawyer is not the same as hiring a divorce attorney. Instead, you're simply getting information about your legal rights and options. One place to look for a lawyer is your local university. It might have, for example, a law school clinic that helps low-income people with family law matters.
You might also try your state's legal aid program or find a local pro bono program. For example, you can search Google for “[your state] legal aid” or “[your city] pro bono program.” You can also look for “pro bono divorce lawyers near me.”
If you can't find a lawyer to help you for free, you might be able to find one who will provide a free consultation. This means you can talk to the lawyer for free for 30 minutes or an hour to get information about your legal rights and options. However, you will likely have to pay the lawyer for their time after the consultation.
Some lawyers will also represent you for a reduced fee, which means you will pay the lawyer less than you would for a typical divorce. But, again, you can ask the lawyer to determine if this is an option during your consultation.
Increase Your Income
As mentioned previously, one of the biggest challenges of leaving your husband is finding a way to support yourself and your children. If you don't have any money, you may need to find a way to increase your income. Not only will improving your income help you financially, but it will also help you emotionally take control of your life.
There are a few ways to do this in addition to the previous programs. Let's look at seven different ideas.
Get a Job
This is the most obvious way to increase your income. If you don't have a job, start looking for one. You can look online, in the newspaper, or at job fairs. Consider getting a part-time job and then looking for a full-time job once you have some money. If you're having trouble finding a job, ask the people you might have contact with daily.
For example, one woman I know got a job helping her child's school teacher. While the pay wasn't great, it helped her get by until she could save enough money for a deposit on an apartment.
Start a Business
Another option is to start your own business, which can be a great way to make money if you're creative and have some business sense. However, it can also be a lot of work. You'll need to create a business plan, find funding, and market your business. If you're unsure where to start, many resources are available online such as the Small Business Administration website.
Sell Your Possessions
In recent years, sites like eBay and Craigslist have made it easy to sell your possessions online. Doing this can be a great way to make some extra money, especially if you have things of value that you no longer need or want. To start, create an account on one of these sites and list your items for sale.
Look for things you no longer need around the house, such as clothes, furniture, or electronics. For example, maybe you have some pairs of shoes you no longer wear or an old television you don't use anymore. Instead of throwing them away, list them online and earn extra money.
Do Odd Jobs for People in Your Community
Many people are willing to pay others to do odd jobs, such as yard work, home cleaning, or running errands. If you need extra money, consider doing odd jobs for community members.
You can usually find these jobs by asking around or looking online. For example, you might look on Craigslist or Facebook groups for people in need of assistance.
If you have neighbors that know of your situation, they might be willing to hire you for yard work or other tasks.
Write Books and Sell on Amazon
If you're creative, you might want to consider writing and selling books on Amazon.
Doing this can be a great way to make money, especially if you have a knack for writing and have time at home to spare. To get started, create an account on Amazon and list your book for sale.
The great thing about writing for Amazon is you don't have to use your real name, which is especially important if you're trying to keep your divorce secret. In addition, you can sell almost any type of book, from novels to self-help guides.
Create a Website or Blog
Another option is to create a website or blog and sell advertising space. Doing this can be a great way to make money if you have a lot of traffic to your site, but it will probably take six months to a year to get good traffic.
To start, create a website or blog and sign up for Google Adsense. Once approved, you can start placing ads on your site and earn money every time someone clicks on an ad. One thing to remember about this is that you'll need to create quality content to attract visitors to your site.
Provide Childcare Services
Finally, if you love children and have some extra time, you might want to consider providing childcare services. Doing this can be a great way to make money, especially if you live in an area with many families.
You'll need to create a childcare portfolio and list your services online to get started. Once you get clients, you can choose how many hours you want to work and how much you want to charge. Then, check with your local laws to ensure you're allowed to provide childcare in your home.
Conclusion
Leaving your husband without money can be difficult, but there are ways to make it happen. You may need to get creative and look for opportunities to make money on your own.
Some organizations can help you get back on your feet. Don't be afraid to reach out for help if you need it. Leaving your husband is a big decision, but it can be the best for you and your family.
Lauren Cook-McKay is the Vice President of Marketing at DivorceAnswers.com. She holds a Master’s Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy (MFT) from the University of San Diego and applies her training in private practice to helping couples struggling in their marriage. She believes there is hope in all marriages and strives to provide therapy to couples that will lead them back towards a loving marriage, or an amicable divorce that brings peace and closure.